Famous baseball player David Wright was hit in the head today and there sure is a big bump on his head where that ball smacked him. We’re all glad that he is going to be alright and at worse suffer a mild concussion. If I got hit in the head with a baseball at 90 miles per hour, I’d probably be in critical condition at the hospital, with severe head trauma and internal bleeding, not to mention a bunch of dead brain cells. I suppose that is why baseball players wear those metal blue helmets, or black if that is their preferred color of choice.

Now I know David Wright is not a ninja or a practitioner of the secret Japanese arts of Ninjutsu, but if he was, he would have been able to have avoided being hit in the head. The way of the ninja teaches you many skills and martial arts, including the ninja’s most prized skill, the art of dodging things, whether it’s baseballs, axes, swords, houses, bricks, gunfire, or rabid beanie baby toys. So if our mythical David Wright was nimble and agile like a ninja, he would’ve been able to dodge or contort his body in such a way that he would have been able to have his head narrowly miss the baseball. Also, do not forget ninjas are very very fast, lightning fast almost, just like the pitcher’s speed when throwing a curve or fast ball.

David Wright getting hit in the head reminds me of this one time when I went to my friend’s place. Now he is a gun fanatic, as many men are, and had a cool looking airsoft bb pistol, which looked almost identical to a USP tactical .45 caliber (counterstrike fans will remember that as simply the USP for CT’s). Anyway, he thought the gun was empty and he always loved pointing it at people’s head. This time the clip or magazine of bb’s was missing but he forgot to empty the chamber which still had one loaded bb pellet in the bullet holder and had it cocked. He pointed it point blank at another friend, Philip, and pulled the trigger, firing a point blank bb at poor Philip’s head. Needless to say Philip got very angry at warren just like David Wright no doubt got super angry at Matt Cain. It left a pretty big bump on Philip’s head and for the next 2 hours I heard Philip whining and angrily bitching about how anyone could be so careless about wielding bb pistols.

I bet this David Wright hit in head story will tell you how David and Philip feel when others accidentally hit them in the hit with objects, bbs, baseballs, glass shoes, books, you name it. But the best remedy for such a big bump on the head is to get some nice bucket of ice, preferably in a bag, and just place it on top of wherever the bump is. It might sting a little and the cold will send chills down your spine, but the swelling will be at a minimum and your bump won’t hurt so much, especially if you’re David Wright who got hit in the head with a big, fast baseball.